Are you thinking of getting back to your ex but are having second thoughts? If you really want to give the relationship another try, you obviously want things to be much better than they previously were. However, this may not always be the case, especially if the other partner is unwilling or isn’t ready to get back with you. There are various things you should look out for before making your decision.
- They use your friends/family to reach you
If your ex-partner is using your family and/or friends to pass you a message rather than coming to you and facing you, chances are that they have something to hide. We’re not talking about them being “friendly “to your own family members and friends. There’s nothing wrong with that, and in fact it’s good to have someone who can get along with people you care about. However, if you repeatedly hear from your buddies things like “he says he still loves you” or “she says she wants you back”, then you should be wary. There’s a high probability that your ex is doing this because they know that you won’t believe them (for a good reason) when they say those same things to you.
- They play stupid mind-games
Another sign that you should not get back to your ex yet is if they’re still playing mind-games with you or acting in a way that they’re manipulating your emotions . For example, doing certain things or uses hero instinct phrases to make you get jealous or angry, telling you they’ve moved on now and later telling you they want you back. It could be worse if they’re ignoring you. These can be an indication that your ex is not serious about getting back together and it’s best to stay away to avoid getting hurt even more.
- They claim all the responsibility
If your ex takes all the blame for the break up (doesn’t let you own up for your part in the break up), it’s best to shelve your thoughts of a reunion for some time. They may keep saying things such as “You were a great person, it’s I who messed up” or “You are wonderful, I made you do this and that”. This is just “emotional bribery”. A relationship is made and destroyed by two people, not one. If your ex doesn’t get this simple fact, you’re likely to experience the same problems that resulted in your break up.
- Doesn’t show any interest about you
You should reconsider getting back to your ex if anytime they contact you ( whether in person , email or phone) they’re always talking about themselves and trying to convince you they’ve changed. Even when they’re talking about the relationship or even you, you realize they don’t have an honest interest in caring about what you think or your needs and wishes. Don’t fall for them yet. They may have hidden selfish interests and it’s best to play a waiting game.
- They blame other people/reasons
If your ex still blames someone else ( for instance you, your relatives (s) , your friend (s), or other people) for the problems you faced in the relationship or for the break-up, it may not be the right time yet to rekindle the love . The chances of you finding solutions to the problems that faced the relationship may be very slim and you’ll likely end up breaking up.